So I really felt the writing bug tonight, yet totally lacked any subject matter. I usually start writing with a story in mind, or at least a subject. Tonight I have searched my brain for something to write about and have come up with only a list of things that I'm not ready to blog about. Curious though why those are the things that come to the surface. The therapist in me makes this into something more. It's probably not blog material because it might hurt feelings that don't deserve to be hurt. So then the question, with a personal blog, where do you draw the line?
Do you write about the people in your family that tick you off?
Do you write about old relationships?
Do you discuss business?
Do you write about old wounds?
Do you write about things you worry about?
Do you write about family stuff?
And the biggest question - How do you keep a personal yet public blog real? So far I have managed, but I seem to lack the subject matter to go forward. Ideas appreciated.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Things I Didn't Know I Was Thankful For
Well today did not happen the way I thought it would. I'll preface this by saying everything is fine, everything is good, and sometimes it's important to be shown what's important.
So this year has been tough financially. Details are not necessary here. Most are in the same boat. Time is running out for the economy to get better. In the past few weeks my family in particular has been hit with some financial nastiness. It is what it is, I'm not happy about it and things could be way worse. I have however had a tough time dealing with the pressure day to day. So luckily Thanksgiving is upon us and we sure have a lot to be thankful for. This I get.
The plan was to have my Mom in law over for the day along with our dear friend Bonnie. Most of you reading this know Bonnie. She is dear to me. No kids this year, my daughters are with their Dad and Megan is with her Mom. Normally we would hide out and binge eat, but we really wanted to have a great day with Mom and Bonnie. And binge eat.
A Little History
Sorry folks but it is necessary at this point. My grandmother spent many holidays in the ER or hospital over the last 5 to 8 years of her life. Sometimes she was genuinely ill, others I think she had anxiety and had physical ailments with no real cause as a result. Either way, you could count on most holidays being not what was planned. Grandma passed in August of 2006. Now Bonnie's Husband Ed passed away on Halloween 5 years ago (See holiday). Ed was so great. A real story teller and could fix the shit out of anything with duct tape despite being a talented mechanic and all around smart guy. We miss him. Bonnie's Mom passed away on Thanksgiving (Hello holiday) several years before that. I didn't know Maxine, but I know I would have adored her from the things I have heard.
So Today
Bonnie calls at Noon (when she was supposed to be here) and says she is feeling somewhat faint and not quite right with some stomach pain. We decide to check in 30 minutes from that point and hang up. We are cool with canceling, postponing, whatever. 30 seconds later Bonnie calls back and says she has some numbness in her left arm. ALARM. So I head over to her house. We decide to go to urgent care instead of the ER. Bottom line, things work out OK. All tests come back fine. Bonnie still doesn't feel quite right, but we managed a dinner and dessert and I do worry that she works retail and has to go in tomorrow. But all tests come back OK.
I started the day dreading getting out of bed, getting the turkey going, thinking it would be another sucky turkey I cooked. I layed around in jammies wishing I could go back to bed, worrying about finances, blah blah. Then I got hit over the head. None of that stuff is important. I hate it when something so obvious has to become a lesson for me. DUH! Mom is healthy. I am healthy. Husband is healthy, kids are great. Bonnie is healthy according to the tests. Ed isn't here to eat turkey and fix things with duct tape. Maxine isn't here to make us laugh and show us what it means to survive. Grandma isn't here to show me how to cook and make me feel like crap at the same time!
I think Ed, Maxine and Grandma were conspiring to teach at least a couple of us a lessons. Some things are important, some things are not. Some things will work themselves out (I hope they do). Nothing can replace those who are dear to us. We are here, we can eat, we can be thankful, we can be of service. Praise God.
Dear Ed, Maxine and Grandma,
Next time you feel we aren't paying you proper tribute, fix that shit with duct tape, crappy advice, and jokes and call it a day.
Ed, Maxine and Grandma get it....so readers don't be ticked off. They teach us daily what is and what is not important. Today I get it. I hope I don't need more reminders.
So this year has been tough financially. Details are not necessary here. Most are in the same boat. Time is running out for the economy to get better. In the past few weeks my family in particular has been hit with some financial nastiness. It is what it is, I'm not happy about it and things could be way worse. I have however had a tough time dealing with the pressure day to day. So luckily Thanksgiving is upon us and we sure have a lot to be thankful for. This I get.
The plan was to have my Mom in law over for the day along with our dear friend Bonnie. Most of you reading this know Bonnie. She is dear to me. No kids this year, my daughters are with their Dad and Megan is with her Mom. Normally we would hide out and binge eat, but we really wanted to have a great day with Mom and Bonnie. And binge eat.
A Little History
Sorry folks but it is necessary at this point. My grandmother spent many holidays in the ER or hospital over the last 5 to 8 years of her life. Sometimes she was genuinely ill, others I think she had anxiety and had physical ailments with no real cause as a result. Either way, you could count on most holidays being not what was planned. Grandma passed in August of 2006. Now Bonnie's Husband Ed passed away on Halloween 5 years ago (See holiday). Ed was so great. A real story teller and could fix the shit out of anything with duct tape despite being a talented mechanic and all around smart guy. We miss him. Bonnie's Mom passed away on Thanksgiving (Hello holiday) several years before that. I didn't know Maxine, but I know I would have adored her from the things I have heard.
So Today
Bonnie calls at Noon (when she was supposed to be here) and says she is feeling somewhat faint and not quite right with some stomach pain. We decide to check in 30 minutes from that point and hang up. We are cool with canceling, postponing, whatever. 30 seconds later Bonnie calls back and says she has some numbness in her left arm. ALARM. So I head over to her house. We decide to go to urgent care instead of the ER. Bottom line, things work out OK. All tests come back fine. Bonnie still doesn't feel quite right, but we managed a dinner and dessert and I do worry that she works retail and has to go in tomorrow. But all tests come back OK.
I started the day dreading getting out of bed, getting the turkey going, thinking it would be another sucky turkey I cooked. I layed around in jammies wishing I could go back to bed, worrying about finances, blah blah. Then I got hit over the head. None of that stuff is important. I hate it when something so obvious has to become a lesson for me. DUH! Mom is healthy. I am healthy. Husband is healthy, kids are great. Bonnie is healthy according to the tests. Ed isn't here to eat turkey and fix things with duct tape. Maxine isn't here to make us laugh and show us what it means to survive. Grandma isn't here to show me how to cook and make me feel like crap at the same time!
I think Ed, Maxine and Grandma were conspiring to teach at least a couple of us a lessons. Some things are important, some things are not. Some things will work themselves out (I hope they do). Nothing can replace those who are dear to us. We are here, we can eat, we can be thankful, we can be of service. Praise God.
Dear Ed, Maxine and Grandma,
Next time you feel we aren't paying you proper tribute, fix that shit with duct tape, crappy advice, and jokes and call it a day.
Ed, Maxine and Grandma get it....so readers don't be ticked off. They teach us daily what is and what is not important. Today I get it. I hope I don't need more reminders.
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