My kids taught me

I'm trying to be better about updating the blog. If I write often, surely I will find something interesting to say...right? Well maybe not.

So who has teenagers? Aren't they fun? Did you know the entire world revolves around just them? I was thinking the earth rotated around the sun, but it turns out, the 13 year old is the center of the universe. Having slightly less gravitational pulls, the 12 and 10 year old. In 2012 I will have children ages 16, 15 and 13, so really, the Mayans may have been right. If it's not the end of the world for the rest of you, it may be for me! Wait, that sounds like the the earth rotates around me....surely not the case.

Did you know if you don't make the mess you don't have to clean it up?? My kids taught me this. This is a gigantic relief. No more picking up dog toys, art supplies, dishes I didn't dirty, underwear I didn't make skid marks in, laundry I didn't get dirty, dust I didn't put on tables. This is truly liberating, because I was under the silly impression that when you were part of a family you were supposed to pitch in. My children have set me straight. Bless their hearts. This changes everything.

If I learned everything I know from I learned from my kids, I would know the following:

Spread your food around the plate if you want to make it look like you ate more.
If they say take 4 bites, make them tiny.
Even if you can't see the floor, the room is still clean.
Cats do love to be smothered no matter how much they screech.
If you say you did a chore and didn't do it, it's as good as done.
I forgot is a totally valid excuse.
I don't know is a great answer.
Oh you have to empty the vacuum????
Cleaning the entire kitchen just means putting a couple dishes in the dishwasher.
If you can't see it, it's put away.
Drawers aren't supposed to be shut.
Socks in the backyard apparently grow trees.
If something is on the floor, DO NOT pick it up.
If you did not make the mess, you are in no way responsible for the mess.
If the trash is full, you should take the time to smash it down, but never take it out.
The bathroom trash should overflow.
Fingerprints smingerprints.
Open windows while the heater is on is great because you get fresh air and heat.

Oh I could go on, and I think I will another time.